I love.
I’ll edit this entry later because I’m so overwhelmed with happy.
You make me feel all things wonderful.
I’ve been to just about a million places,
With placid seas and perfect scenery,
But just to know you’re right here with me,
Well you make the perfect company.
I will never forget the day that my mommy decided to do some “spring” cleaning at home. She deemed it appropriate that, because I am getting older and moving away to college, she should rid the house of everything impractical or obsolete. Of course, this was entirely subjective and I stumbled upon a scene of absolutely insanity as I found my room oddly sparse, the closet empty of everything but the old piano and a few odds and ends of sowing machines, purses, and staplers. It was eerie, seeing things that weren’t where they were supposed to be. Didn’t I have my taekwondo belts in the top drawer there? How about my amateur, finger-painted renditions of my family when I was 5? She was throwing out items that I had grown to love and cherish throughout my childhood and I found myself taken aback at this sudden discomfort in my chest. Prior to that, I suppose I had taken these simple objects for granted. It wasn’t until I saw the barren walls and vacant drawers that I substantiated the value of these objects by which my life became acquainted with over the years.
Humans are a sentimental people. We value things that, individually, may be worth more than its value in gold but, to others, may not receive anything more than a passing glance. I, for one, am not an exception to this. More than others, I embrace the concept that less is more, and that a three or four figure price-tag doesn’t necessarily equate to significance. Heck, some of the things I cherish the most aren’t even worthy of being sold at garage sales, or donations even. I’ve internalized the realization that beauty is truly in the eyes of the beholder and that the actual value of an item is different than the stirring it creates in the heart. Yes, there are objects that I hold dear, and while no one will participate in bidding wars for these items, they mean more than the world to me.
I lost something today that, from an outsider’s point of view, was but a solid line of navy on my angular wrist. To me, it meant no less than the efforts of a friend who remembered this boy’s birthday and decided that he was worth spending more than enough time acquiring carefully-chosen threads, minuscule-sized change, and hours of threading and knotting. The bracelet was gorgeously simple; its composition reduced to some thread attached to a penny half the size of normal pennies. Rather than just jewelry adorning my wrist, it rendered itself as a good luck charm and tangible, appreciable evidence that someone out there thought about me. The gift manifested itself into my flesh and the fine strand of twisted fibers that hung from my wrist put my body into this sense of safety and assurance. Weird huh? It’s hard to describe how much it meant to me so I’ll describe similar feelings when I realized I had lost it somewhere.
It’s kind of like losing a puppy out in the mountains
It’s kind of like misplacing the wallet that contained all your Prom pictures
It’s kind of like deleting the harddrive that had all your music
It’s kind of like forgetting where you put your cardboard box that was chock full of child photos
It’s kind of like losing the misshapen, porous blanket you had since you were a baby
It’s kind of like displacing the receipts documenting where you and your friend ate during the year
It’s kind of like an old person forgetting his children’s names
So what can I take away from this? To stop playing so much basketball?
No, not at all. Do not fear losing things. I would go so far as to say do not even fear losing the sentimentality of your prized possessions. Even though their whereabouts are unknown, as long as the value remains in your heart and mind, the object more than serves it purpose and that’s more than enough.
I am going to liveblog this ish. This entry will be updated accordingly as the night goes on.
11:46 pm - Back from Late Night. Bruindogs = delish, but unsatisfying. Like everything in life.
12:05 am - I have convinced myself to resume studying.
12:06 am - Oh wait, hold up. My stomach is reacting to the Rendezvous and Bruindogs.
12:10 am - I just shat a chocolate lake. Back to studying.
01:45 am - WHY DOES IT GET SO COLD AT NIGHT? Oh, that’s why. I am shirtless and the window is open.
02:15 am - I don’t really like my writing. I’m outlining notes of my notes and everything looks like chicken-scratch. At least I color-coded?
02:37 am - Distraction alert! I just HAD to check facebook. I swear 75% of my news feed is covered with people and their quizzes. In Liz Lemon’s words, “BLERG!”
02:49 am - I think biologists purposely name compounds in as tortuous a way as possible. Beezies.
02:56 am - Just cracked my neck and back. Sounded kinda like a machine-gun going off, except it felt good. SO good.
03:06 am - Just checked. Tortillas, definitely.
03:08 am - People who eat their own scabs (or scabs in general) are gross. I admit, I do sometimes wonder what they taste like…*holds scab in front of lips*
03:25 am - It’s getting awfully lonely now…time to look at Kitty picture and desktop background.
03:31 am - Worst decision I’ve made today, looking at thisiswhyyourefat.com this late at night. Monte cristo sandwich gimme gimme!
03:48 am - Do computers like to sleep too? I am getting a little crazy, I think. Empathizing my laptop? CRAZY!
03:57 am - A couple more pages left and I can sleep. I am going to shower in the morning (Good mownin’) because this lad is a wee bit tired.
04:09 am - Eff diz foos I am going to sleep and wake up tomorrow morning to review some more. Yadidamean? I have an inkling my dreams will consist of food and/or DNA. I am so hungry.
Peace.
Sometimes I like to set things back a little and put life into perspective by watching HD videos of the natural world around me (Nerdalert). I haven’t been able to explore much outside of California, having only been to Canada and Mexico, so seeing these montages of places scattered around the world reminds me that there is so much more out there. It’s a stark reminder that my current safe boundaries were once unknown frontiers. This thought inspires me to fill my backpack with clothing and my wallet with change and just Go. Wouldn’t it be something, to explore? To experience something wholly different than the norm?
I am planning on going to Puerto Rico sometime within the next year, but this video should suffice for now. In actuality, it is just wetting my appetite. What a tease.
Materialistic Things I Don’t Need, But Wouldn’t Mind Having: Part 1 - Clothes
P.S. Umami is too delicious and deserves to be on every list of every thing, ever.
